Loving Life

I think that my greatest achievement has been becoming a mother. My kids are an absolute joy and even in the trying moments, I see that they are beautiful people who love life.

My daugther is just about the happiest person I've ever known. She sings, dances, talks (a little too much at school) and rarely has a bad day. She's so thoughtful and is great at problem solving because she looks for a solution that makes everyone happy. I've always been a little strict with her, but that's because I want to instill strong values and a good work ethic; looking at who she is at 6 years old, I feel confident that she will grow to be an amazing woman!

I was thinking the other day about who Marissa really is and what makes her so happy and I realized that the answer is really so simple. Marissa LOVES life. She finds joy and beauty in just about everything around her. She's optimistic; she's a dreamer, but she always creates her own happiness. What a great lesson for us all to learn! She doesn't rely on others to fulfill her life, she strives to bring happiness to others and she is confident that the world is full of magic and love.

You know, I believe she's right! How could anyone argue that when they see the kindness of a stranger, the love and friendship of siblings, the devotion of parents to their children and the perseverance of humanity in a crazy world. Obviously, with beauty and love comes ugliness and hate, but I'll take Marissa's stance, "love your life and take each moment with a smile!"

Before 30

My birthday came and went and man was it lovely! My husband made sure that I had a relaxing weekend and I really enjoyed myself!

As I reflected back on my 29 years, I realize that I am truly a blessed individual and I have so much to be thankful for. I can't believe how my life has turned out and I know that I too often take my life for granted.

Not that I think 30 is old, but since it is noted as a "milestone" in life, I will go ahead and create a list of things that I would like to accomplish this year.

1. Run a half marathon
2. Participate in the warrior dash
3. have a real start to my first book
4. travel wine country
5. take latin dance lessons


I'm sure that the list will grow. I've got 364 days to go, so I better get crackin'!

Turning 29

My birthday is in less than a week. I'm entering my last year of my twenties and I can't tell you how much I've looked forward to my thirties! However, now that I'm approaching 30, I'm starting to feel like time is moving too fast. My twenties were hard. I had a lot of growing pains, but I had a lot of joy too! I met my husband, got married, had two beautiful children, started a business... I have so much to be thankful for!

I can't help but wonder what my thirties will bring... What will I accomplish and what things do I have around the corner? I'm going to create a list of things that I would like to do before turning the big 3-0 and I'm also going to compile a list of things that I would like to do in my thirties! I'm excited, I think that my life is moving in a fabulous direction and I look forward to what this next decade will bring!

Harmony

I'm not sure I should even breathe this aloud; perhaps I'll jinx myself or spoil the moment. I'll do my best to not sound as though I'm gloating, but I can honestly say that my life is pretty damn near perfect. It's about time, too! After the year we've had, it is sweet relief to be able to openly admit that things are going so well. Mind you, we still have the daily issues, the bump and grind of hard work and the challenges of the not-so-hot economy. But overall, I feel that life, my life, has found harmony.

My children are at an extremely fun age. I didn't think I would enjoy Marissa being 6 as much as I do, but its turning out to be one of my most favorite stages! She's such a sweet sweet girl! She's smart and enthusiastic and just so full of life! I love it! She has really blossomed at school and even though she's a bit of a chatter box, I think for the most part she's doing very well. She's quieter at home and more thoughtful. She's also much more helpful than she's ever been. She does chores, helps with her brother and her and I share the most interesting conversations. She is an absolute delight...

Christian has hit the terrible 3's. Whoever came up with the "terrible 2's" obviously never had children. 2's were a breeze! 3's are a nightmare! Well, only a nightmare when the 3 year old doesn't get his way. Christian is talkative, funny, strong-willed and persistent. He's enjoyable because he's communicating so much better, but because he's communicating so much better...he's also much more demanding. Well, at least I know that this is just a phase and soon I'll be wishing he was still 3 and allowing me to cuddle him in my lap. As we know, boys grow up and their mother will not always be their number 1 gal. I'll take this while I can and appreciate him being so young.

Marty is my best friend. We're closer now than we've ever been in the almost 9 years we've been together. He's a saint. I say that a million times, I know, but its the truth. He's solid and steady and just always knows how to handle any situation. He's my level head and my voice of reason; anyone that knows me knows I definitely need a voice of reason! I just feel so connected to him and confident in our relationship. I don't question his love for me or the kids and I know that I bring so much to his life as well. I feel balanced.

Life is good. I definitely feel like I see the rainbow I've been searching for!

My Baby Boy is THREE

It's hard to believe that Christian is already three. He is just the sweetest little guy in the whole world. He is constantly cracking jokes, giving kisses and hugs and the stuff he says will just make you turn your head and listen!

This year, we celebrated with a Monster Party. He loved every minute of it. We had the party at a local park and we could not have asked for better weather.

I wish I could say that I love how big he is getting, but its hard for me to see my "baby" grow so fast. With Marissa, I couldn't wait for each milestone, but with Christian each day is just one step closer the realization that I no longer have a baby boy. He's wise beyond his years and has the best sense of humor. He's curious and strong and thoughtful and inquistive. He's so much like his daddy.

Speaking of daddy, Christian absolutely adores Marty. He follows him around, mimics everything that he does and will brush me off to the side to spend some quality time with his "best bud". I don't really mind it, as I love to see my husband in this role. I really do love my Loftus men. Christian constantly tells me that his daddy is his buddy and that when he grows up he's going to be a "fixer helper" like his dad and build things.

Christian is all boy; running, jumping, climbing and crashing. My father in law wasn't lying when he said most boys should be born with helmets on; all they do is run into walls. That pretty much sums up Christian's activity level. He's athletic and nimble. I have a feeling he's going to wear me out!

So here begins another year, I anticipate great things for my young man. I'm so proud of him; of both my children. They are such good little people!

A good day!

Today was a beautiful day. I watched my brother, Michael, stand there with his wife, Jessica and have their daughter baptized. It was such a blessing to witness...

My brother was always my sidekick. He was my best friend, my buddy, my partner in crime and my guinea pig in everything that I did as a child. He's 5 years younger than I am, but I have always felt extremely close to him. He married the second sweetest girl in the entire world and together they have the sweetest girl in then entire world, Savannah.

I stood there today, one row behind them, watching them as they held their daughter, standing with her sister, Heather and his best friend, Vince. Vince's girlfriend, Ronnie, snapping pictures, Vince's brothers (might as well be Michael's brothers too) Tyson, taking a video, the youngest brother of the Leone boys, Jonathan, beaming with pride (all four men dressed in matching shirts, vests and bowties!) you get the idea... EVERYONE played a huge part in today's events. Heather got emotional while standing there as Savannah was being blessed; that's when I lost it.

I looked around the room and I didn't see a baptizm; I saw a family--love. People standing in this little church, proclaiming to God, "We love this child." It gave my heart wings. During the ceremony, Savannah smiled, cooed and pointed at my two children. I was so touched by all the happiness, love and adoration that our family shared.

We went back to my parents' home for a reception. There we ate, chatted, laughed... It was such a nice time. Jessica's family visiting with our family; the Leone's (all debonair men) showing their support to my brother and his new little family. I felt 100% at peace. As my husband, kids and I headed home, I was overwhelmed with comfort and love. I was so proud of my brother and so touched to see how loved he, his wife and his child are by so many.

I can't really put into words the feelings that were silently passed through all the people today. All I can say is that family is made up of many things. It does not require anything except that those included are willing to stop the world to be there for those they care about. We celebrated a life being committed to Christ; what we witnessed was a family being committed to each other.

It was a good day; a very good day.

Suddenly Six

How did this happen? Marissa turns six this week. I just can't believe it; it seems as if I just brought her home from the hospital yesterday. I remember her wearing this tiny little pink outfit with little pink mittens on her tiny hands to keep her from scratching her face.

We brought her inside the house in her infant carrier and set it on the kitchen table and then looked at each other and said, "now what do we do?" Both Marty and I were just lost. She rarely cried, she slept a lot and I nursed round the clock. I remember setting the pack-n-play up in the living room and just sitting there staring at her. I was paralyzed by this overwhelming love unlike anything I had ever experienced.

Over the years we've reached many milestones; first tooth, first steps, first words... We moved from crib to big girl bed, Goodnight Moon to Junie B. Jones, diaper bags to tye-dye messenger bags filled with lip gloss, sunglasses and iPods (carried by her not by me) Gone are the days of organized play dates where the toddlers toddle around while the moms gossip and catch up on the latest baby trends; our social calendar now consists of movie playdates, drop off parties and giggling girls hiding in the bedroom talking about the latest and greatest as they prepare for first grade.

So she's suddenly six and I'm suddenly feeling the world spinning wildly as I chase any evidence that she's still a baby girl. I'm not too worried though, she still enjoys a good snuggle with me as we read together, we share our own giggles over pedicures and with each day that she grows more and more into a young lady, I feel her grow closer and closer to me in a special way that only a mother and daugther can understand.

Happy 6th Birthday, Princess. I love you more than chocolate cake...