A good day!

Today was a beautiful day. I watched my brother, Michael, stand there with his wife, Jessica and have their daughter baptized. It was such a blessing to witness...

My brother was always my sidekick. He was my best friend, my buddy, my partner in crime and my guinea pig in everything that I did as a child. He's 5 years younger than I am, but I have always felt extremely close to him. He married the second sweetest girl in the entire world and together they have the sweetest girl in then entire world, Savannah.

I stood there today, one row behind them, watching them as they held their daughter, standing with her sister, Heather and his best friend, Vince. Vince's girlfriend, Ronnie, snapping pictures, Vince's brothers (might as well be Michael's brothers too) Tyson, taking a video, the youngest brother of the Leone boys, Jonathan, beaming with pride (all four men dressed in matching shirts, vests and bowties!) you get the idea... EVERYONE played a huge part in today's events. Heather got emotional while standing there as Savannah was being blessed; that's when I lost it.

I looked around the room and I didn't see a baptizm; I saw a family--love. People standing in this little church, proclaiming to God, "We love this child." It gave my heart wings. During the ceremony, Savannah smiled, cooed and pointed at my two children. I was so touched by all the happiness, love and adoration that our family shared.

We went back to my parents' home for a reception. There we ate, chatted, laughed... It was such a nice time. Jessica's family visiting with our family; the Leone's (all debonair men) showing their support to my brother and his new little family. I felt 100% at peace. As my husband, kids and I headed home, I was overwhelmed with comfort and love. I was so proud of my brother and so touched to see how loved he, his wife and his child are by so many.

I can't really put into words the feelings that were silently passed through all the people today. All I can say is that family is made up of many things. It does not require anything except that those included are willing to stop the world to be there for those they care about. We celebrated a life being committed to Christ; what we witnessed was a family being committed to each other.

It was a good day; a very good day.

Suddenly Six

How did this happen? Marissa turns six this week. I just can't believe it; it seems as if I just brought her home from the hospital yesterday. I remember her wearing this tiny little pink outfit with little pink mittens on her tiny hands to keep her from scratching her face.

We brought her inside the house in her infant carrier and set it on the kitchen table and then looked at each other and said, "now what do we do?" Both Marty and I were just lost. She rarely cried, she slept a lot and I nursed round the clock. I remember setting the pack-n-play up in the living room and just sitting there staring at her. I was paralyzed by this overwhelming love unlike anything I had ever experienced.

Over the years we've reached many milestones; first tooth, first steps, first words... We moved from crib to big girl bed, Goodnight Moon to Junie B. Jones, diaper bags to tye-dye messenger bags filled with lip gloss, sunglasses and iPods (carried by her not by me) Gone are the days of organized play dates where the toddlers toddle around while the moms gossip and catch up on the latest baby trends; our social calendar now consists of movie playdates, drop off parties and giggling girls hiding in the bedroom talking about the latest and greatest as they prepare for first grade.

So she's suddenly six and I'm suddenly feeling the world spinning wildly as I chase any evidence that she's still a baby girl. I'm not too worried though, she still enjoys a good snuggle with me as we read together, we share our own giggles over pedicures and with each day that she grows more and more into a young lady, I feel her grow closer and closer to me in a special way that only a mother and daugther can understand.

Happy 6th Birthday, Princess. I love you more than chocolate cake...

Good Bye Kindergarten!

I feel like I just posted about her STARTING Kindergarten! When did she get so big? So school is officially over and the summer break has started. I enjoyed having Marissa at the preschool camps with me yesterday, although she looked so big next to all the preschoolers!

Next week the chaos of summer camps begin. She goes to dance camp, then science camp, then we'll go the beach to spend some time with the Fabulous Five aka The Foley Family, then we're back for Spanish camp then water camp then camp theater...it goes on and on for the next 12 weeks!

We selected 6 chapter books we will read over the summer. She's reading "Charlie and The Chocolate Factory" right now. She LOVES it. She said she loves it even more than the movies! :o) That's my girl! Its bittersweet to see her reading on her own. I'm so proud of her, but I miss the close cuddle time we shared over "Silly Sally" and "Goodnight Moon" Now, she's reading those books to her brother!

I'm always amazed by how incredible a person Marissa is and will continue to be! She has her father's heart, a spark of her own and good head on her shoulders! Good bye, Kindergarten; look out world, here comes Marisssa!

I'm HERE!

I am absolutely terrible about posting to this blog. I guess I just don't feel that I have anything really that "important" to say. My life is pretty busy, but I think pretty normal. :o)

Some new things going on for me are that I got my personal training certification, I have my first "gig" with the band this weekend (have I posted yet that I'm going to start singing with a band? That will have to be a separate post!) I'm teaching the pre-k 4 class now and really enjoying it! So, preschool owner/director/teacher by day, personal trainer on the side and rockstar on the rise! LOL! Pretty normal if you ask me!

Marissa is in her last week of Kindergarten. I'm a blubbering mess! When did she get so big? Why does she have to grow up so quickly!?!?! She's almost SIX years old!!!!! I'm so proud of her. She played Lacrosse this spring, is getting so good at the piano, loves dancing and we've recently learned that she has a GORGEOUS singing voice! Her teacher calls her "songbird". My heart just overflows with love for this precious little girl!

Christian is my bear...he's all boy and getting pretty brave and adventurous. He moved up to the Monkey (3 year old) classroom this summer and he's just a riot. He's sweet as pie, but tough as nails! His speech is amazing, he has zero interest in potty training, and his big brown eyes could melt you like butter!

Marty is doing great. He's working hard, looking amazing (he's working out too and really in fantastic shape!) and keeping me smiling! He's my very best friend and we've found that life has really been good to us, despite the curve balls we've been dealt recently.

So that's life for our little Loftus clan. I really will TRY and be better about posting over here!

Bemom

We love you, Bemom. You'll be forever in our hearts.

This is somewhat therapeutic for me. I just need to get it out...

Yesterday, I got the call that my mother-in-law had passed away very suddenly. She was a very healthy woman and this was a complete shock to us all. Our family is beyond devastated. Karen, was not simply my mother-in-law, in fact, she was one of my very best friends. She was my biggest cheerleader, confidant, supporter and we were closer than perhaps most women are even as close to their own mothers. I'm taking this very hard.

I met Karen when I was 20 years old. She and my father-in-law are not married, but have been together for over 3 decades. She immediately accepted me as part of the family and the more I got to know her to deeper I fell I love with her. She was the smartest, kindest and most brilliant woman I had ever known.

When my husband and I would argue, Karen was the first person I would call. I suppose she gave me the best advice on how to live with Martin Tiernay, as she had spent her life living with Martin James and they are absolutely cut from the same mold. She would tell me, "Alice Anne, there's a reason why those Loftus men need women like us... We're the only ones that handle them!"

Karen was there with me through the pregnancy and birth of both my babies. She loved those children with all her heart. Marissa was especially close to her. They would spend hours upon hours playing dress up, hosting tea parties, talking about birds (a love of nature that they both shared immensely!) and doting over Bebop. Karen loved to shower Marissa with beautiful dresses and toys and books; she spoiled the girl rotten! Karen's greatest strength (and weakness) was her ability to follow orders without fail when it came to Marissa. I really believe that Marissa was her world and vice versa.

As Christian was getting older, he was becoming closer and closer to Karen. He adored his Bemom. One day they spent together playing and then Christian had to take a nap. When he awoke, Bemom had already gone home. He searched the house, and after several minutes, his first words were, "My Bemom left me." I immediately called Bemom to tell her what he had said and she just laughed and then cried! She said it warmed her heart to the core because he was finally understanding and loving her!

Our lives are forever changed. The loss of Karen, Bemom, Friend, is so intense I feel empty and completely heartbroken. As much as I cherish and appreciate my time with her and feel blessed to have been able to have her in my life, I feel robbed. I feel that it just wasn't enough time and I'm devastated. I ache for my children and their loss, I worry for my father-in-law and I grieve for all our family. Karen was simply, the most wonderful person we have ever known and we love her more than words can express.

May God help us find peace and may Karen always know how much we love her. We will carry her in our hearts for all our days....

Family Update

I feel awful that I don't keep up with this blog as much as I do with Figuring It Out. I guess I just don't have tons to share that most people don't already know!

Life is super crazy right now as we wind down with the end of the school year. Marissa has dance recitals, lacrosse, piano, playdates, etc. I feel like her calendar is busier than mine! Tonight we have recital pictures and I won't lie that I'm probably more excited about it than she is. I absolutely love having a girly girl and the costumes, make-up, hair do's and glitz are just perfect for us both!

She plays lacrosse (LAX) two nights a week and she's really enjoying it. I'm proud of her; she's really pushing herself physically and participating in something she's not very skilled at. As long as she enjoys it, I will support it!

She had a piano recital a couple weeks ago and boy did she make us proud! She looked so tiny next to that big grand piano, but she played her "Baa Baa Black Sheep" with confidence, poise and without error! I definitely had to fight back tears!

Christian is more boy than I can handle! He's fearless, energetic, fiesty and all loverboy! He bats those big brown eyes at me and I melt. Marty tells me that I have no control over the child...he's probably right. I can't help it. He's in the potty training stages, and is as inconsistent as Maryland weather. I'm in no rush though. I'd be happy to keep him as a baby forever! He's moving up to the pre-k 3's class in June and I'm having a hard time with him growing up so fast!

Marty is busy at work, despite the economic times, he's staying busy. We're thankful for our jobs and just hoping to survive these hard times. I think things will get a little worse before they get better. I'm definitely thankful that Marty has a good head on his shoulders and had the foresight to buckle down and prepare for the hard times!

The preschool is going well, I'm pluggin' away and getting ready for the summer session to begin. Enrollment will be lower this summer, but I think we're all looking forward to the smaller class sizes and personal attention we can give the kids. The camps look like they are going to be tons of fun and then we'll be set to start the fall school year off with a BANG!

I'm 14 weeks out from my women's figure competition. I'm hitting it hard. I struggle some with the nutrition (not eating enough) but the workouts are going really well. Marty has been a huge support and my friends and family are such wonderful cheerleaders! I hope everyone can make it Washington, DC Aug. 14th to cheer me on!

So that's the Loftus Update! I'll keep you all posted!

Easter Pictures!