Siblings

I have been blessed with two beautiful children. It was early in my life when I realized how badly I wanted to have children. I think some women are just programmed to want to be mothers. I believe that my children are my greatest accomplishment in life.

We had Marissa our first year of marriage and after many conversations, pleas, fights and realizations, we had Christian 3 1/2 years later. I believe that our children have made us better people and have at many times made our marriage stronger. As parents, Marty and I have learned to rely on one another and support each other through the not-so-easy parenting moments..

My children are as different as two people can be; they have many moments when they do not see eye to eye. However, as I have watched them grow and connect with one another I realize that they have developed a deep love and friendship that only siblings can know.

Seeing my children together reminds me of my relationship with my own brother, Michael. We have an unspoken language of love and understanding. I couldn't have asked for a better brother and friend. I hope that my children continue to grow and nurture their friendship and will recognize that no matter what, they will ALWAYS have each other!

The Silver Lining

Whenever something bad happens in life, I try my best to see the silver lining. I have to believe that there is a reason. I try and find if there was some life lesson, some hidden blessing, or some other purpose for my misfortune. Some may say that I am naive or that I am in denial; life just isn't fair is what most would argue.

When I look at my life as a whole, without any hesitation I would admit to feeling blessed. Even when life throws me a lemon, I might not be able to make lemonade of it, but at least I know that I have the love and support of my family and friends.

Maybe there aren't silver linings to bad situations, maybe life just sucks sometimes, but I guess the greater lesson is knowing that you'll get through it and that everything will be ok.

Tough Decisions

I have found that any time I am experiencing great personal growth, it usually involves having to make a tough decision. Either with work, marriage, child rearing, friendships, money, life is all about choices and most of the time they aren't easy. I guess if everything were easy, I would not really grow.

So many times you hear those tired quotes and cliches about growth and accomplishment; "mistakes are not failure, but a chance to learn and grow"... What does that mean? Are there really any wrong answers? Are we all just floating around in chaos and occasionally bumping into opportunity and good fortune? Is all this planning and thinking honestly getting me anywhere? Who truly wins in the end?

I feel that I often struggle with what my heart wants and my head knows. I'm sure I'm not the only one that finds myself in that predicament. I'm always battling with internal conflict. I'm either always winning or always losing. Its tiring.

So for today, I'm faced with the questions: Should we plan that trip? Did I do the right thing by having Marissa at horse camp? Do I need to let someone go? Do I really need a housekeeper? Should we hold off on the home renovations? Should I invest in this business opportunity? The list goes on and on! I'm filled with doubt, guilt, hope, anxiety and excitement. I guess sometimes you just have to make a choice and hope for the best. I take comfort in knowing that I'm not alone...

"Friendship is a word, the very sight of which in print makes the heart warm" - Augustine Birrell

Over the years of my life, I have made many friends. There have also been times in my life when I have gone without a friend in the world; heartbroken and lonely. Looking at my life today, I feel very blessed by the friendships that I have and I realize that those friendships did not happen by accident.

I think that the word "friend" is tossed around lightly. It is so easy to quickly label someone with that word, but the actual work of a friendship takes constant nurturing partnered with mutual respect and dedication. I look at my relationships that I have with people and I realize that with each true friend that I have, my life is so much brighter and full. Not because each person brings something to me, but because with each relationship I grow and my life is filled with compassion and understanding. Also, I feel that I can give myself to them in a way that is without shame or judgement. I can truly be myself and I know that I can accept people for who they are, completely.

I have a small group of friends, true friends; you know? The ones that you call when your heart is broken, or when your life is spinning with excitement and happiness. True friends feel your emotions and listen with their hearts. They offer advice with a level head and with your best interest in tow. They laugh with you until your sides hurt and they will sit with you in silence as your grieve. They are extensions of your soul. I never considered myself rich, until I counted my friends.

My friends are very diverse. My best friend, as cliche as it may sound, is my husband. He is strong and steady. He sees all dimensions of my complexity and he loves me without doubt. My closest girlfriend has known me since I was a young teenager. She has seen me grow and change. She appreciates the woman that I have become and she holds near and dear to her heart the girl that I was before. We speak an unspoken language of love and understanding. I know that no matter how I grow or change, the one thing that remains constant is my love and respect towards her. Our lives are intertwined and bonded in a way that is almost as if we were sisters.

I have been so fortunate to make friends as an adult. In a society that is so fast moving and competitive, it is hard to let down the barriers and connect with others. I feel lucky to have met a few women where we instantly had a connection. We are all going through similar stages in our lives. We're married, raising children, working hard and nurturing the woman that lives inside each of us. We're connected through a passion and love of life and well-being. I feel supported, encouraged and valued through these friendships; its full circle. I think about those friends and I can't wait to see them and connect with them. I love them, for who they are and who I am with them.

Friends are with your for a season, a reason or a lifetime. Whatever it may be, they will forever leave an impression on your heart and you will never be the same. Our friendships are what mold us to be the person we are; the lessons on love and friendship are what give us insight into who we want to be.

*the picture is of my daughter and her friend, Kendall. May she be blessed with friends and may she grow to know the value in being in a friend!

Just Another Manic Monday!

Ready, set, GO! Let the week begin! The word, "Monday" is almost like a dirty word to most. It represents the end of the weekend, the beginning of the work week, and has a ring of RESPONSIBILITY! Most Sunday evenings, I find myself mentally organizing the upcoming week and switching gears to prepare for the many tasks and obligations adult life brings.

A typical Monday begins with an alarm clock going off at 5am and with much dismay, I leave the comfort of my king size bed and ready myself for the day's adventures. I shower, get dressed, get the kids up, bathed, dressed and out the door by 6:30-7am (on a good day- I do find that some days I'm pushing 8am) Thank GOD for my Keurig, I get a fresh cup of coffee every morning in less than 90 seconds and I'm out the door! I love getting to the center early so that my kids can have breakfast there. Its just so much easier!

I spend the first half hour at work in my office checking email and enjoying my coffee in silence. I know that my children are safe and happy with their teachers and classmates, and I really enjoy this time to organize myself, read emails and catch up with my good friend, Christine, on instant messenger! (I am so happy that someone else begins their day as early as I do!)

Monday mornings are usually pretty quiet until about 9am. All the children are in their respective classrooms and the teachers have all greeted one another and caught up on the weekend news. At about 9:30, the flood of emails begin. All the parents have had the weekend to collect their thoughts and plan out how they would each approach me with their questions, concerns, complaints and applauds...I spend the majority of the morning solving problems, putting out fires and reassuring parents that their child is right on track and developing great friendships, as well as progressing normally with all the developmental milestones. I don't complain about this part of my job because I realize that these parents rely on our center to help shape and mold their children into thoughtful contributing citizens! I also recognize that it is my job to inform parents of how their child does in our care...many parents only see their children for a few hours a day!

The other big part of my Monday is preparing the staff for the week. Everyone needs to know what's on the snacks and lunch menu, they need to be informed of all special events and programs, and it is important that they are given any details about students as well as who is attending and who is out for the day or week. Most of the time, they are given this information the week prior, but Mondays are always so hectic and we're all recovering from the weekend its a good idea to give reminders.

Usually by lunch time, we can see how the week will proceed. The children each come in with their stories from the weekend and we can generally feel the "mood" of the group. If we successfully complete the first day of the week, we feel confident about the remaining four days, however there have been Mondays when we are all wishing Friday could come a little faster.

So what will this Monday bring? We shall see, but I can tell you whatever is in store for us today will leave us wishing that Sunday was just a little bit longer...