The hardest job I've ever had...

is being a mommy. Granted, it is also the most rewarding thing in my life. I sometimes wish that parenting came with a training manual or a "reset" button. Wouldn't it be nice if we could say, "oops, I didn't like how that worked out, let's just reset this and try something different." when it comes to decisions we make regarding discipline and structure? A good friend of my mother-in-law's once told us that everything is just a phase, not to get to comfortable with anything a child does because if you wait a minute, everything will change. She laughed and said, "just when you figure it out, they enter an entirely new phase and you've got to start all over again with trying to learn how to parent."

Marissa is a chatterbox and even more so a songbird; we've already established that. She's a happy little person with a lot of spunk and only a little self-regulation. Its 4 AM and I can't sleep because I'm conflicted in how we are going to teach her the appropriate times for chattiness and singing while at the same time celebrating her spirit.

Apparently, she's a bit of a disruption issue at school. It breaks my heart because she doesn't have a mean bone in her body and she has the biggest heart of anyone I've ever known. I truly believe she does not realize that she's doing something wrong at school. Regardless, her behavior is unacceptable and I don't know how to get it through to her that she needs to be quiet. Half the time, I don't think she is even aware that she's talking or singing aloud...she's just in her own little world, or as I've stated before its more like we're characters in her own personal musical production.

I love my kids, of course, I'm their mother; but I adore who they are. Marissa lights up a room when she walks in. She is kind, beautiful and good hearted. She is brilliant, magnificent...I could go on and on. I truly appreciate who she is a person and I would not change her for anything. My heart overflows for her. How do I get through to her the importance of her behavior when #1 she doesn't understand what an issue this is #2 I believe that it is almost physically impossible for her to keep her music inside her and #3 I don't want to extinguish the spark that makes her so wonderful?

I could really use a good night's sleep...